Friday, February 23, 2018

No progress on any front. Sales desperately needed, which means shares are, too.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

She's been here off and on all day, watching over me. I've needed it today.

Bitterly cold winds, no progress on any front, fear for the next few weeks settling in hard (especially since I now live with fear all day every day, for simple survival). The crew was supposed to be back next week (already two months late); now we have to call them all and tell them not to come. Indefinitely. Which means losing them to other jobs. In the meantime, I'm worried about making it out of the next month alive. I can't think about that too much, and I'm too tired for anything more. The rest is cut and paste, because I said last night, I have so much to do and I'm so far behind.

Still working on the platform launch. It may happen sooner, but given my breathing and brain fog issues and how slow I am (and how overloaded, as a result), I'm shooting for March first. That said, the first goal is to retire two specific medical bills totaling $1,676 (oh, hell, make it a flat $1,700; PayPal takes out major fees), so it's still possible to kick in in advance via the donate button here. It's not even a tenth of what I owe thus far for the hospitalizations and heart cath and other testing, but it's a start.

For the rest of it — basic living expenses to get through the winter, to say nothing of bringing the crew back part-time to make the stairs safe and finish the cabinets and the rest of the house — what we need are SALES. We had reason to believe that we would be okay, at least for a good long while, but that has not materialized, so I am back to pushing sales every second I'm able, even as I try to cadge moments to work on these other projects. And I am completely worn out, so the rest is cut-and-paste.  

Please. Spread the word. Valentine's Day's gone, but people have birthdays, anniversaries, I-love-you days; there'll be other holidays and seasons coming up before you know it. Please spread all of our links around on FB and Twitter and other social media, via e-mail and word-of-mouth, to your family and friends and colleagues and whoever. The O2 issue is now solved, but there are all the ongoing regular expenses, the astronomical medical expenses, and of course, someday we'd like to be able to get the house finished. I have no hope of that happening anytime soon; I don't know how we're going to get through the rest of this winter, given current circumstances. So here are the links: 
  • Tonight's post elsewhere (what I need to do, when the depression takes over);
  • A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to She-Wolf's & my medical bills);
  • Wings's direct PayPal link;
  • Wings's site, for sales;
  • Wayfair gift cards, to replenish all the furnishings that the RV has destroyed in one way or another.
  • Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).
  • Partial registry #2, from Wayfair. There are some things left on both registries that I thought by now I might be able just to buy outright, but medical bills (mine and She-Wolf's both) have to come first.

I've been trying to find some sort of accommodation with this oh-my-god-you're-going-to-die thing that keeps happening, which is to say, every time it crops up, I smack it ruthlessly back down and force myself to sit and breathe through it. It's not working. I'm doing it regardless, but these recent episodes are terrifying. We need, also, to get free of some of this crushing stress, and I don't see that happening as long as I have to spend every day scrabbling (mostly unsuccessfully) for whatever sales we can make. Closure's imminent, and I see no way to get through it now. In spite of it all, though, thanks, everybody, from both of us, for everything. I don't know about tomorrow, but at least today I got to see the dawn, and I got to play with puppies.



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

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