Saturday, June 29, 2024

I am at the end of my fucking tether.

Photo copyright Aji, 2024; all rights reserved.

At least somebody's enjoying the weather. I wasn't quick enough to get the shot when he had all four legs in the air, so I had to settle for the "look at me; the grass has me completely stoned" routine.  Which lasted all of twenty seconds, natch.

Gray everywhere now, but no rain yet. Just oppressively hot and humid, which just makes me feel worse all the way around. Not that it takes much under circumstances like these; I didn't fall asleep util sometime after 6 AM, and I was awake again around 8. Fewer than two hours' sleep, and even that constantly interrupted by pain, means that I am not even barely functional today. I'm also not in a frame of mind that will tolerate nonsense. everything's terrible; I've got no help with it; and people think they can treat me disrespectfully and still make demands, and right now, I'm just done.

Thanks to a rheumatoid factor is that sky-high, many times higher than the last time it came back positive, the pain and fatigue are out of control. Unfortunately, that means regular bouts of insomnia, and nothing touches any of it. The other thing that causes insomnia is the constant stress, because there is so much that has to be covered and no money to cover any of it. Wings just refuses to think about it, on the theory that it will work out somehow, but as the one who actually has to find a way to make it "work out somehow," I don't have that luxury. I also don't have any help; just demands on me from other people.

And I am at the end of my fucking tether.

The last few weeks have been a nightmare of medical and bureaucratic nonsense. I still have to deal with the imaging, but I can't do that until we have a lot more money coming in than we do now. That will run into four figures easily, and right now, I have literally nothing, so that's a big ol' nope for now. Of course, if there is something big bad lurking, the longer I delay, the worse it'll get. We had to shell out over $600 cash over the last two days, for medical stuff and the $400 yesterday for his scrips [plus I also have to deal with everything that finally got us to the point of getting them changed in the first place]. That's after a few hundred last week, for all of our labs, and there will be more labs and more appointments and I still have the fucking scans for myself, and given the sense of urgency [none] in this fucked up country, I will probably die before I can afford to get them done [which would solve it, at least]. But that's the way it is in a country that prizes death over life, so here we are.

On top of that, I've already missed the deadline with the IRS to avoid the next round of penalties and interest, but I have GOT to get this off my desk, and there's no way I can do that without really major sales coming in. And there's none of that, which means that I am buried under all of this for the foreseeable, so if it's not related to bringing in sales, I'm likely not doing it. [What I am doing is losing my fucking mind, so there's that.] I got the two new solid-silver cuffs up the other day, here and here, plus a new ingot pendant, here; last night, I got the two Art Deco cuffs posted, here and here, and they're fabulous. There are also a ton of new earrings posted in the Earrings Gallery, all from the last month or so. Generating income is all that matters at this point, which means sales are all that matters. Links are here:

  • Sales here
  • Testimonials here
  • Amazon wishlist here (Amazon cards are probably most useful at this point); 
  • Patreon here;
  • Ko-fi here.

After such a grim year, this one already even worse than the last, we really need to get 2024 onto a better footing, so please share all of the links. 



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Wings and Aji, 2024; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.                              

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