A queen brings breathing room. Annual closure begins tomorrow, so sals (and thus shares) will still be needed.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

When you're a queen, all you need for camouflage is a little bit of gold.

I wouldn't know; I'm the farthest thing possible from it.

Good news today on a couple of fronts. We got Wings's meds corrected, so with a little luck, his BP can start returning to normal. He seems to be in very good health overall, at least.

Second, we now have metaphorical breathing room (although I'd really like to have the literal form, too, but nothing happens on that front for a month of so, at a minimum, and I just have to deal). Tony's been working on another project, but as soon as he's done, we can get him and Reynaldo back (and potentially Marcos for a few odds and ends) to get back to work on the stairs and cabinetry. We also have breathing room on a couple of other fronts, too. Not enough to cover all that AND my medical bills, which means that I'll be moving forward with launching the new funding platform on my site to try to take are of that in stages (shooting for tomorrow for the launch, but the day's already booked with stuff that wasn't supposed to be an issue, so who knows). But in the meantime, the immediate pressure is off, and I could not be more grateful. It's one thing not to be able to breathe because there's something physically haywire in my chest; it's another thing entirely not to be able to breathe simply because of the weight of the financial and other stresses we've been carrying for so long. The latter is greatly diminished tonight, although the day has been incredibly stressful right up to the minute in ways that have me tearing my hair out. But our gratitude to the what and the who that have made this possible is . . . beyond mere words.

But we do still need sales. Those are what get us through the year as a whole (and form the basis for everything, including the house and my medical bills). The Pueblo closes starting tomorrow, and that means very little in the way of tourist trade for anybody. These are the long hard days of winter, and until it reopens well into spring, they will stay that way for everyone. We are fortunate to have this cushion, but there's a lot looming, most noticeably the bill collectors who dun me daily for five figures' worth of emergency medical stuff. The rest is cut-and-paste, because I am, as always, worn out by this point in the day, but today especially; it's bitterly cold, with high winds and flurries of snow and sleet, and the chest pain is as constant as the labored breathing now. I hate being fragile, I hate not being able to pull my weight, I hate the fear and uncertainty, but it is what it is. And we need consistent sales. So please. Spread the word. Valentine's Day's gone, but people have birthdays, anniversaries, I-love-you days; there'll be other holidays and seasons coming up before you know it. Please spread all of our links around on FB and Twitter and other social media, via e-mail and word-of-mouth, to your family and friends and colleagues and whoever. So here are the links: 

• Tonight's post elsewhere (I spend a lot of time doing both);
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to She-Wolf's & my medical bills);
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• Wings's site, for sales;
• Wayfair gift cards, to replenish all the furnishings that the RV has destroyed in one way or another.
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).
• Partial registry #2, from Wayfair. There are some things left on both registries that I thought by now I might be able just to buy outright, but medical bills (mine and She-Wolf's both) have to come first.

I've been trying to find some sort of accommodation with this oh-my-god-you're-going-to-die thing that keeps happening, which is to say, every time it crops up, I smack it ruthlessly back down and force myself to sit and breathe through it. It's not working. I'm doing it regardless, but these recent episodes are terrifying. With both of us having now had recent scares, I'm just grateful to see the dawn with the man I love more than life itself. To do so from safety and warmth, at seven years with neither? And with a puppy who looks like a miniature Lilith having adopted us all as her pack? We're blessed. 

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

At the Edge of the Water

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

Now posted at The NDN Silver Blog, it's one of Wings's newer works, suited to this unseasonal winter in two ways. We stand now at the edge of the water in the sky, and we hope and pray that the forecast holds well enough that we may soon stand at its edge here on the face of the dry and thirsty land.

The post is here. Wings's main page is here. Inquiries via the site's Contact form. And, as always, sales are very much needed (especially now), so shares of the site link are much appreciated.



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

The feral dog population; errands and calls and arrangements and exhaustion. Sales and shares very much needed now.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

Just in case you were wondering what the half-feral dog population is here. Every one of these dogs has been here at one time or another, to keep from starving. They all get fed eventually.

We're both exhausted, but we did get today's errands done and calls made. He has a PCP follow-up tomorrow, to try to get the orders in for testing and get the changes made to his meds. The latter WILL happen, one way or another. He's still feeling better today; that industrial-strength beta blocker evidently works wonders. No idea what the bills are going to be.

I'm at a pretty low ebb physically tonight, so the rest is cut and paste from here on.

We do still need sales, though. Those are what get us through the year (and form the basis for everything, including the house and my medical bills). The Pueblo closes in less than a week, and that means very little in the way of tourist trade for anybody. These are the long hard days of winter, and until it reopens well into spring, they will stay that way for everyone. The rest is cut-and-paste, because I am, as always, worn out by this point in the day. I hate being fragile, I hate not being able to pull my weight, I hate the fear and uncertainty, but it is what it is. And we need consistent sales. So please. Spread the word. Valentine's Day's gone, but people have birthdays, anniversaries, I-love-you days; there'll be other holidays and seasons coming up before you know it. Please spread all of our links around on FB and Twitter and other social media, via e-mail and word-of-mouth, to your family and friends and colleagues and whoever. So here are the links: 

• Tonight's post elsewhere (a lot of us need this reminder);
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to She-Wolf's & my medical bills);
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• Wings's site, for sales;
• Wayfair gift cards, to replenish all the furnishings that the RV has destroyed in one way or another.
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).
• Partial registry #2, from Wayfair. There are some things left on both registries that I thought by now I might be able just to buy outright, but medical bills (mine and She-Wolf's both) have to come first.

I've been trying to find some sort of accommodation with this oh-my-god-you're-going-to-die thing that keeps happening, which is to say, every time it crops up, I smack it ruthlessly back down and force myself to sit and breathe through it. It's not working. I'm doing it regardless, but these recent episodes are terrifying. We need, also, to get free of some of this crushing stress, and I don't see that happening as long as I have to spend every day scrabbling (mostly unsuccessfully) for whatever sales we can make. Closure's imminent, and I see no way to get through it now. In spite of it all, though, thanks, everybody, from both of us, for everything. I don't know about tomorrow, but at least today I got to see the dawn, and I got to play with puppies.

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

Red Willow Spirit: Seeking Magic, Finding Medicine

Photo copyright Wings, 2018; all rights reserved.

Now posted at The NDN Silver Blog, it's an edition of Red Willow Spirit for the downward slope of winter, a time when we all need a little magic and mystery. It's a lesson from a changing climate, too, reminding us that beauty exists even in extremis, that what perceive depends on perspective, and that our task now lies in seeking magic, finding medicine.

The post is here. Wings's main page is here. It's all photos today, and as always with Wings's work, they're available for purchase in any of the usual three formats; simply inquire via the site's Contact form. Also as always, sales are very much needed (especially now), so shares of the site links are much appreciated.



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Wings and Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

A dark day of a different sort, although it's all right now. Sales (and shares) still needed.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

You can't tell from this size (you'll have to click on it to see the larger version), but the photo shows snow on the Spoonbowl, visible to the naked eye tonight. And up until a little while ago, this day was looking pretty dark indeed. Certainly not what we were expecting.

We just got home a little while ago from the ER. Not for me this time; for Wings. He hasn't been feeling well lately, mostly a product of these monster winds, but today, he was feeling worse, and early this afternoon, his blood pressure spiked dangerously high. He did all of the usual de-stressing things, and it continued to climb. So we bypassed the clinic and went straight to the ER. As it turns out, he's okay; no elevated enzymes, so no cardiac event. His EKGs were good. But we did discover a couple of markers that should enable us to get him on the proper meds protocol (the one we've been trying to get him on for well over a year). That should take care of it. Fortunately, we love each other beyond description, and we both talk and listen to each other, and he was willing to do the thing he least wanted to do in the world (go to the ER) to be on the safe side.

It was a terrifying few hours, though, and we're both completely wiped out. He's already gone to bed, and I'll be heading that way shortly. The dogs were stressed, too; Raven and She-Wolf are both completely crashed at my feet, and little Crow is sound asleep in She-Wolf's doghouse. Cut and paste from here on.

We do still need sales, though. Those are what get us through the year (and form the basis for everything, including the house and my medical bills). The Pueblo closes in less than a week, and that means very little in the way of tourist trade for anybody. These are the long hard days of winter, and until it reopens well into spring, they will stay that way for everyone. The rest is cut-and-paste, because I am, as always, worn out by this point in the day. I hate being fragile, I hate not being able to pull my weight, I hate the fear and uncertainty, but it is what it is. And we need consistent sales. So please. Spread the word. Valentine's Day's gone, but people have birthdays, anniversaries, I-love-you days; there'll be other holidays and seasons coming up before you know it. Please spread all of our links around on FB and Twitter and other social media, via e-mail and word-of-mouth, to your family and friends and colleagues and whoever. So here are the links: 

• Tonight's post elsewhere (the most important light);
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to She-Wolf's & my medical bills);
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• Wings's site, for sales;
• Wayfair gift cards, to replenish all the furnishings that the RV has destroyed in one way or another.
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).
• Partial registry #2, from Wayfair. There are some things left on both registries that I thought by now I might be able just to buy outright, but medical bills (mine and She-Wolf's both) have to come first.

I've been trying to find some sort of accommodation with this oh-my-god-you're-going-to-die thing that keeps happening, which is to say, every time it crops up, I smack it ruthlessly back down and force myself to sit and breathe through it. It's not working. I'm doing it regardless, but these recent episodes are terrifying. We need, also, to get free of some of this crushing stress, and I don't see that happening as long as I have to spend every day scrabbling (mostly unsuccessfully) for whatever sales we can make. Closure's imminent, and I see no way to get through it now. In spite of it all, though, thanks, everybody, from both of us, for everything. I don't know about tomorrow, but at least today I got to see the dawn, and I got to play with puppies.

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

Monday Photo Meditation: Close and Open View

Photo copyright Wings, 2018; all rights reserved.

Now posted at The NDN Silver Blog, it's a photo meditation for a season when the golden willows are darkening early, and when the water has come unexpectedly. It's a reminder that, in a world rapidly changing, we too need to shift our perspective, not getting lost in the background but noticing that which is in close and open view.

The post is here. Wings's main page is here. As always, his photos are available for purchase in any of the usual three formats; simply inquire via the site's Contact form. Also as always, sales are very much needed (especially now), so shares of the site links are much appreciated.



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Wings and Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

Sleeping dogs of various sorts. Sales and shares badly needed.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

Sleeping in the sun while She-Wolf works on her bone. That's Crow on the left, Coyote on the right, and Cricket at the top.

As to everything else, I can say I'm going to fight, but right now the wind and my body make it impossible.

I'm in too much pain to compose coherent sentences tonight. Suffice to say that it's been a horrible day, high cold winds, worrying about Shade, worrying about my own ability to stay upright. That last is not assured, but you know what they say about sleeping dogs. Cut and paste from here on.

We do still need sales, though. Those are what get us through the year (and form the basis for everything, including the house and my medical bills). The Pueblo closes in less than a week, and that means very little in the way of tourist trade for anybody. These are the long hard days of winter, and until it reopens well into spring, they will stay that way for everyone. The rest is cut-and-paste, because I am, as always, worn out by this point in the day. I hate being fragile, I hate not being able to pull my weight, I hate the fear and uncertainty, but it is what it is. And we need consistent sales. So please. Spread the word. Valentine's Day's gone, but people have birthdays, anniversaries, I-love-you days; there'll be other holidays and seasons coming up before you know it. Please spread all of our links around on FB and Twitter and other social media, via e-mail and word-of-mouth, to your family and friends and colleagues and whoever. So here are the links: 

• Tonight's post elsewhere (what I only wish I could do);
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to She-Wolf's & my medical bills);
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• Wings's site, for sales;
• Wayfair gift cards, to replenish all the furnishings that the RV has destroyed in one way or another.
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).
• Partial registry #2, from Wayfair. There are some things left on both registries that I thought by now I might be able just to buy outright, but medical bills (mine and She-Wolf's both) have to come first.

I've been trying to find some sort of accommodation with this oh-my-god-you're-going-to-die thing that keeps happening, which is to say, every time it crops up, I smack it ruthlessly back down and force myself to sit and breathe through it. It's not working. I'm doing it regardless, but these recent episodes are terrifying. We need, also, to get free of some of this crushing stress, and I don't see that happening as long as I have to spend every day scrabbling (mostly unsuccessfully) for whatever sales we can make. Closure's imminent, and I see no way to get through it now. In spite of it all, though, thanks, everybody, from both of us, for everything. I don't know about tomorrow, but at least today I got to see the dawn, and I got to play with puppies.

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

To Warm the World and Light Our Lives

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

Now posted at The NDN Silver Blog, it's one of Wings's newer works, an ancient motif wrought in an old traditional style. It's the image of a rolling sun, a spirit capable of finding its way through any wind to warm the world and light our lives.

The post is here. Wings's main page is here. Inquiries via the site's Contact form. and, as always, sales are very much needed (especially now), so shares of the site links are much appreciated.



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

A lot. Some good news and tears of gratitude. Sales (and thus shares) still badly, consistently needed.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

Today's been a lot.

Shade is still not feeling well. She's been lying down a lot the last three days (no, it's manifestly NOT colic, and it doesn't appear to be a laminitis flare, either). Miskwaki loves lying in the sawdust, just luxuriating in the softness of it (no surprise, given his awful history), so for him it's nothing unusual. Shade, though? She never does this. Yet here she is, and this time, Miskwaki's lying there purely to keep his girl company. The vet's been notified, and she's monitoring second-hand while we keep a hawk's eye on her here.

It's been another bitterly cold day, not for the actual temperature but for the terrible winds. The house is so incredibly warm that I forget just how bad it is outside, and then I go out and I'm reminded how miserable it is. Wings is doing far too much, but that's the case when I can't help out. At least River was here working today, and he helped Wings take some hay to the horse down the road. Turns out the family needed some help with some traditional stuff, so we did what we could there, too. Here, the half-wild all-starved neighbor dogs continue to come and eat, thanks to the folks who sent puppy kibble. Crow has apparently moved in here — she's now sleeping in She-Wolf's doghouse just outside the front door every night — but right at dawn, Coyote comes bounding over to play with her sister. The one who was all bones (still is, for that matter) now makes a beeline for me on sight, shoves his head under my hand to be petted, then attaches himself to my leg. Takes him a moment or two, and then he sits at perfect, flawless attention, even though he's had no training. As the DogRates guy says, "They're good dogs, Brent."

Things are looking up a bit today on the house front at least for the moment; thanks to a surprise today (and the beautiful one responsible), we may have the guys back more or less on schedule. I wept with relief at the prospect of not having to lose them to other jobs. Looking not so up on the health front, but that's nothing anyone can do anything about until I can get in to see the doctor again and get some imaging ordered. I spend an inordinate amount of time lately trying to shove the fear down and get on with everything. I hate being afraid. I'm not ready for anything final. I'm fighting, all the way.

We do still need sales, though. Those are what get us through the year (and form the basis for everything, including the house and my medical bills). The Pueblo closes in less than a week, and that means very little in the way of tourist trade for anybody. These are the long hard days of winter, and until it reopens well into spring, they will stay that way for everyone. The rest is cut-and-paste, because I am, as always, worn out by this point in the day. I hate being fragile, I hate not being able to pull my weight, I hate the fear and uncertainty, but it is what it is. And we need consistent sales. So please. Spread the word. Valentine's Day's gone, but people have birthdays, anniversaries, I-love-you days; there'll be other holidays and seasons coming up before you know it. Please spread all of our links around on FB and Twitter and other social media, via e-mail and word-of-mouth, to your family and friends and colleagues and whoever. So here are the links: 

• Tonight's post elsewhere (this day; my reality);
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to She-Wolf's & my medical bills);
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• Wings's site, for sales;
• Wayfair gift cards, to replenish all the furnishings that the RV has destroyed in one way or another.
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).
• Partial registry #2, from Wayfair. There are some things left on both registries that I thought by now I might be able just to buy outright, but medical bills (mine and She-Wolf's both) have to come first.

I've been trying to find some sort of accommodation with this oh-my-god-you're-going-to-die thing that keeps happening, which is to say, every time it crops up, I smack it ruthlessly back down and force myself to sit and breathe through it. It's not working. I'm doing it regardless, but these recent episodes are terrifying. We need, also, to get free of some of this crushing stress, and I don't see that happening as long as I have to spend every day scrabbling (mostly unsuccessfully) for whatever sales we can make. Closure's imminent, and I see no way to get through it now. In spite of it all, though, thanks, everybody, from both of us, for everything. I don't know about tomorrow, but at least today I got to see the dawn, and I got to play with puppies.

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

The Beautiful Side of Survival

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

Now posted at The NDN Silver Blog, it's a pair of works wrought in vintage style, ones that, unusually for Wings, are sold as a set. It's a necklace and earrings featuring messengers of love and renewal, transformative spirits of warmer winds, those who remind us, in these bitter days, of the beautiful side of survival.

The post is here. Wings's main page is here. Inquiries via the site's Contact form. And, as always, sales are very much needed (especially now), so shares of the site links are much appreciated.



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

No progress on any front. Sales desperately needed, which means shares are, too.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

She's been here off and on all day, watching over me. I've needed it today.

Bitterly cold winds, no progress on any front, fear for the next few weeks settling in hard (especially since I now live with fear all day every day, for simple survival). The crew was supposed to be back next week (already two months late); now we have to call them all and tell them not to come. Indefinitely. Which means losing them to other jobs. In the meantime, I'm worried about making it out of the next month alive. I can't think about that too much, and I'm too tired for anything more. The rest is cut and paste, because I said last night, I have so much to do and I'm so far behind.

Still working on the platform launch. It may happen sooner, but given my breathing and brain fog issues and how slow I am (and how overloaded, as a result), I'm shooting for March first. That said, the first goal is to retire two specific medical bills totaling $1,676 (oh, hell, make it a flat $1,700; PayPal takes out major fees), so it's still possible to kick in in advance via the donate button here. It's not even a tenth of what I owe thus far for the hospitalizations and heart cath and other testing, but it's a start.

For the rest of it — basic living expenses to get through the winter, to say nothing of bringing the crew back part-time to make the stairs safe and finish the cabinets and the rest of the house — what we need are SALES. We had reason to believe that we would be okay, at least for a good long while, but that has not materialized, so I am back to pushing sales every second I'm able, even as I try to cadge moments to work on these other projects. And I am completely worn out, so the rest is cut-and-paste.  

Please. Spread the word. Valentine's Day's gone, but people have birthdays, anniversaries, I-love-you days; there'll be other holidays and seasons coming up before you know it. Please spread all of our links around on FB and Twitter and other social media, via e-mail and word-of-mouth, to your family and friends and colleagues and whoever. The O2 issue is now solved, but there are all the ongoing regular expenses, the astronomical medical expenses, and of course, someday we'd like to be able to get the house finished. I have no hope of that happening anytime soon; I don't know how we're going to get through the rest of this winter, given current circumstances. So here are the links: 

• Tonight's post elsewhere (what I need to do, when the depression takes over);
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to She-Wolf's & my medical bills);
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• Wings's site, for sales;
• Wayfair gift cards, to replenish all the furnishings that the RV has destroyed in one way or another.
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).
• Partial registry #2, from Wayfair. There are some things left on both registries that I thought by now I might be able just to buy outright, but medical bills (mine and She-Wolf's both) have to come first.

I've been trying to find some sort of accommodation with this oh-my-god-you're-going-to-die thing that keeps happening, which is to say, every time it crops up, I smack it ruthlessly back down and force myself to sit and breathe through it. It's not working. I'm doing it regardless, but these recent episodes are terrifying. We need, also, to get free of some of this crushing stress, and I don't see that happening as long as I have to spend every day scrabbling (mostly unsuccessfully) for whatever sales we can make. Closure's imminent, and I see no way to get through it now. In spite of it all, though, thanks, everybody, from both of us, for everything. I don't know about tomorrow, but at least today I got to see the dawn, and I got to play with puppies.

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

Friday Feature: To Live In a Longer Light

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

Now posted at The NDN Silver Blog, it's a small work by a Pueblo master set in warmer winds, but well-suited to this unseasonably warm winter. It's a depiction of a rabbit hunt, horses as guides among the desert sage, all spirits who seem to encourage us, too, to spring back to life and enjoy the chance to live in a longer light.

The post is here. Wings's main page is here. inquiries via the site's Contact form. And, as always, sales are very much needed (especially now), so shares of the site links are much appreciated.



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

A short-term rescue, and a few inches of snow. Platform launch still in process. Sales (and shares) very badly needed.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

Today's rescue. Yes, that's a dark-eyed junco. She smacked into the window this evening, all our decals and bandannas and shiny silvery spiraly things notwithstanding. I went out to see whether she was well enough to have flown away, and found her half upside-down, right wing and right leg tangled up together at an awkward angle.

I picked her up gently (she's an adult, not a chick), got her righted, and let her rest in my hand for ten minutes or so. Then we put her in Ember's old crate, lined with one of Wings's scarves, and gave her some water. If she'd needed to stay, we would've brought in some food for her, too, but after 20 minutes or so, I went to check on her . . . and she hopped out and promptly flew up onto the top of one of the vigas. I retrieved her, for about two seconds, and then she landed on a couple of other vigas, the chandelier, and eventually the windowsill, where she was hoping to get out. I caught her there and carried her outside to the feeder and had her sit in it for a minute. Then, in an explosion of feathers, she took off, flying southward toward the stand of red willows. I think she'll be fine.

Four to five inches of snow today, although part of it has melted off already (and part of it has blown off, too; I'm past ready for this wind to go, but apparently it's sticking around for a while). We'll take the snow, though; this is the first real weather we've had all winter. 

I have so much to do and I'm so far behind.

Still working on the platform launch. It may happen sooner, but given my breathing and brain fog issues and how slow I am (and how overloaded, as a result), I'm shooting for March first. That said, the first goal is to retire two specific medical bills totaling $1,676 (oh, hell, make it a flat $1,700; PayPal takes out major fees), so it's still possible to kick in in advance via the donate button here. It's not even a tenth of what I owe thus far for the hospitalizations and heart cath and other testing, but it's a start.

For the rest of it — basic living expenses to get through the winter, to say nothing of bringing the crew back part-time to make the stairs safe and finish the cabinets and the rest of the house — what we need are SALES. We had reason to believe that we would be okay, at least for a good long while, but that has not materialized, so I am back to pushing sales every second I'm able, even as I try to cadge moments to work on these other projects. And I am completely worn out, so the rest is cut-and-paste.  

Please. Spread the word. Valentine's Day's gone, but people have birthdays, anniversaries, I-love-you days; there'll be other holidays and seasons coming up before you know it. Please spread all of our links around on FB and Twitter and other social media, via e-mail and word-of-mouth, to your family and friends and colleagues and whoever. The O2 issue is now solved, but there are all the ongoing regular expenses, the astronomical medical expenses, and of course, someday we'd like to be able to get the house finished. I have no hope of that happening anytime soon; I don't know how we're going to get through the rest of this winter, given current circumstances. So here are the links: 

• Tonight's post elsewhere (what winter is, for all of us);
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to She-Wolf's & my medical bills);
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• Wings's site, for sales;
• Wayfair gift cards, to replenish all the furnishings that the RV has destroyed in one way or another.
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).
• Partial registry #2, from Wayfair. There are some things left on both registries that I thought by now I might be able just to buy outright, but medical bills (mine and She-Wolf's both) have to come first.

I've been trying to find some sort of accommodation with this oh-my-god-you're-going-to-die thing that keeps happening, which is to say, every time it crops up, I smack it ruthlessly back down and force myself to sit and breathe through it. It's not working. I'm doing it regardless, but these recent episodes are terrifying. We need, also, to get free of some of this crushing stress, and I don't see that happening as long as I have to spend every day scrabbling (mostly unsuccessfully) for whatever sales we can make. Closure's imminent, and I see no way to get through it now. In spite of it all, though, thanks, everybody, from both of us, for everything. I don't know about tomorrow, but at least today I got to see the dawn, and I got to play with puppies.

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

#ThrowbackThursday: Free to Be

Photo copyright Wings, 2018; all rights reserved.

It's #TBT at The NDN Silver Blog, with a work from at least a dozen years ago, perhaps more, that was an entry in one of Wings's small and informal signature series. It's a pin wrought in ledger-horse fashion, but this is a warrior horse who carries the imagery of powerful spirits, and he reminds us that, like him, we are free to be.

The post is here. Wings's main page is here. This work sold about a dozen years ago, but if the style speaks to your spirit, simply inquire via the site's Contact form; Wings can create a version uniquely your own. And, as always, sales are very much needed (especially now), so shares of the site links are much appreciated.



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Wings and Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

Dawn in high mountains, and my way to get there. Sales (and shares) very badly needed.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

I have a very high mountain to climb.

I've been trying, for the better part of two months, to get my new site truly up and running. Up to now, posts have been essentially placeholders, filler until I could get it operational.

It's almost there.

It's going to be a private version of Patreon (which, after much urging by many people, I caved in and signed up for, to no practical effect save the hacking of my data). In this instance, I will control the data flow, and the only entity to take out fees will be PayPal. There will be subscription/sponsorship levels and rewards in the form of access to specific content, content of the caliber I've always been known for. It'll be a mix of fun stuff, imagery, fiction, poetry, and harder-edged policy analysis and critical theory. It may also include work built around Wings's art. There will be free items, too, but the whole purpose of this endeavor, one I've been trying to work on for too many years, is to free me up, ultimately, to write. For the short term, it's also to help free me from the deadly stress of the medical bills that continue to mount as the doctors fail to find what nearly killed me (and keeps trying to return to finish the job). 

My first stab at retiring this medical debt is only a small fraction of the $25K+ that continues to climb: $1,676. It's not a lot, but it's more than we have. That amount will pay off the local ambulance fee ($741) and the hospitalist's fee ($935; the hospital itself is into me for 10 times that amount). Then there will be the ambulance to Albuquerque, Lovelace and its doctors, and myriad smaller fees for imaging and labs and all sorts of things. In the next few days, the project for the $1,676 will go up, so watch this space and that one, and please subscribe.

For the rest of it — basic living expenses to get through the winter, to say nothing of bringing the crew back part-time to make the stairs safe and finish the cabinets and the rest of the house — what we need are SALES. We had reason to believe that we would be okay, at least for a good long while, but that has not materialized, so I am back to pushing sales every second I'm able, even as I try to cadge moments to work on these other projects. And I am completely worn out, so the rest is cut-and-paste.  

Please. Spread the word. Valentine's Day's gone, but people have birthdays, anniversaries, I-love-you days; there'll be other holidays and seasons coming up before you know it. Please spread all of our links around on FB and Twitter and other social media, via e-mail and word-of-mouth, to your family and friends and colleagues and whoever. The O2 issue is now solved, but there are all the ongoing regular expenses, the astronomical medical expenses, and of course, someday we'd like to be able to get the house finished. I have no hope of that happening anytime soon; I don't know how we're going to get through the rest of this winter, given current circumstances. So here are the links: 

• Tonight's post elsewhere (a gift I thought I wouldn't live to see);
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to She-Wolf's & my medical bills);
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• Wings's site, for sales;
• Wayfair gift cards, to replenish all the furnishings that the RV has destroyed in one way or another.
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).
• Partial registry #2, from Wayfair. There are some things left on both registries that I thought by now I might be able just to buy outright, but medical bills (mine and She-Wolf's both) have to come first.

I've been trying to find some sort of accommodation with this oh-my-god-you're-going-to-die thing that keeps happening, which is to say, every time it crops up, I smack it ruthlessly back down and force myself to sit and breathe through it. It's not working. I'm doing it regardless, but these recent episodes are terrifying. We need, also, to get free of some of this crushing stress, and I don't see that happening as long as I have to spend every day scrabbling (mostly unsuccessfully) for whatever sales we can make. Closure's imminent, and I see no way to get through it now. In spite of it all, though, thanks, everybody, from both of us, for everything. I don't know about tomorrow, but at least today I got to see the dawn, and I got to play with puppies.

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

A Time to Rise

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

Now posted at The NDN Silver Blog, it's one of Wings's more recent works, a piece of talismanic properties and cosmic proportions that reminds us how we came to be. It's a reminder, too, of the damage we must repair, and likewise a warning: We live in a time of earth rising to the challenge of survival, and it is a time to rise for us, too.

The post is here. Wings's main page is here. Inquiries via the site's Contact form. And, as always, sales are very much needed (especially now; without our customary savings from holiday sales, I'm worried about how we'll make it through this month, never mind the next), so shares of the site links are much appreciated.



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

Fangs and claws, and floppy ears and tails. No way to get through the winter without sales, so shares are desperately, desperately needed.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

Crow, left; Cricket, right. Yes, the ear mostly stays like that. A couple of weeks ago, they were the exact same size, which is to say, all bones. Crow is now visibly larger, thanks to solid weeks of meals. Cricket is larger than he was, and healthier-looking, too, after only a week of food. He's also losing his fear, and these two spent almost the entire morning romping in the thin rime of snow in the fields. Coyote was there, too, albeit out of camera range, and the other dogs showed up early this afternoon for Wings to feed them.

They'll never leave now, but they're living beings, and we can't leave them to suffer and starve.

Yesterday was absolutely hellish, with winds gusting above the 50-mph mark. Today the winds were better, but not by much, and much colder than yesterday. Where my autoimmune disease is concerned, I've learned to adapt to cold and heat and humidity (which is to say, I put up with it and ignore it as much as possible), but wind is completely intractable. It jacks my pain levels exponentially, and now, with this . . . whatever it is, it makes breathing increasingly difficult. I spent most of the night on oxygen again, and tonight will probably be more of the same.

All this is by way of noting that my energy reserves are entirely gone for this day. We do need sales. Badly. Without them, we have no way to get through the rest of the winter, since this year, we have no reserves from holiday sales. Yes, l'm scared. The rest is cut-and-paste. 

Again, if you're thinking about donating, DON'T. Give it to Bobby to help get Don Feliberto back into a real home. Here's the latest update. We know what it's like not to have one; we have one now, and donations need to go there to get this elder safe again. I posted a second piece at my other site a couple of nights ago about Bobby's efforts in Puerto Rico, including his adoption of Don Feliberto to get this abandoned elder into safe space again. That will tell you what he's up against, and my e-mail's in my Blogger profile here (or you can DM at Twitter/FB); hit me up for his addresses if you want to contribute, either cash (most needed) or household and other items, some of which you can purchase outright via the Amazon Wishlist Bobby's set up here. He's added a bunch of new items, all badly needed, and I can testify to the fact that need for the power cords, the tools, and the solar lights and equipment is probably exigent at this point. That said, when you're in a situation like Don Feliberto is, it's amazing how wonderful clean clothes and good coffee can make you feel, too.

What we need are SALES. Please. Spread the word. Valentine's Day's gone, but people have birthdays, anniversaries, I-love-you days; there'll be other holidays and seasons coming up before you know it. Please spread all of our links around on FB and Twitter and other social media, via e-mail and word-of-mouth, to your family and friends and colleagues and whoever. The O2 issue is now solved, but there are all the ongoing regular expenses, the astronomical medical expenses, and of course, someday we'd like to be able to get the house finished. I have no hope of that happening anytime soon; I don't know how we're going to get through the rest of this winter, given current circumstances. So here are the links: 

• Tonight's post elsewhere (a warning on a day when winter itself is predatory);
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to She-Wolf's & my medical bills);
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• Wings's site, for sales;
• Wayfair gift cards, to replenish all the furnishings that the RV has destroyed in one way or another.
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).
• Partial registry #2, from Wayfair. There are some things left on both registries that I thought by now I might be able just to buy outright, but medical bills (mine and She-Wolf's both) have to come first.

I've been trying to find some sort of accommodation with this oh-my-god-you're-going-to-die thing that keeps happening, which is to say, every time it crops up, I smack it ruthlessly back down and force myself to sit and breathe through it. It's not working. I'm doing it regardless, but these recent episodes are terrifying. We need, also, to get free of some of this crushing stress, and I don't see that happening as long as I have to spend every day scrabbling (mostly unsuccessfully) for whatever sales we can make. Closure's imminent, and I see no way to get through it now. In spite of it all, though, thanks, everybody, from both of us, for everything. I don't know about tomorrow, but at least today I got to see the dawn, and I got to play with puppies.

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.

Red Willow Spirit: How We Survive

Photo copyright Wings, 2018; all rights reserved.

Now posted at The NDN Silver Blog, it's an edition of Red Willow Spirit for a tempestuous day in the harshest season of the year. It's a look at spirits and obligations of place and time and culture, and reminder that action on behalf of others is how we survive as peoples.

The post is here. Wings's main page is here. As always, Wings's photos are available for purchase in any of the usual three formats; simply inquire via the site's Contact form. Also as always, sales are very much needed (especially now), so shares of the site links are much appreciated.



All content, including photos and text, are copyright Wings and Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.