Photo copyright Aji, 2023; all rights reserved. |
This is the week in the season when the maple leaves go true red. Too warm; no weather (which I would much prefer), but still beautiful.
I can't believe how tired we both are, and it's only Monday. Wings has been picking up my slack because of my hand-wrist, as well as all his usual work, as well as being hard at it in the studio daily on a time-sensitive commission (which came out spectacularly beautifully, and is now on its way). For me it's all lupus-related.
I know people who don't have one of these diseases don't really understand what that means. For me, right now, it means that I am dealing with constant full-body pain, localized to an acute stage in neck/shoulder, both hands/wrists, both hips/knees/feet. More than that, I have unresponsive dislocations in my right hand and wrist [my dominant hand]; in my right knee, which goes out on me multiple times a day; and in the metatarsal bones of both feet with attendant stress fractures in both; and either a spinal dislocation or a slipping disc in my lower back. The pain is not really something English has words to describe in any concrete way, because most people think that acute pain is something that gets fed pain meds and then gets healed [or you die from whatever injuries caused it], and they just don't have a frame of reference for what it means to go through your day and try to function, try to work, try to do what needs to be done when all of your body, it's absolute agony.
But things have to get done.
It also means that I have constant mouth ulcers, disintegrating molars [the prednisone], dry and itchy eyes, itchy lesions on my eyelids, a need for oxygen to breathe when I sleep, and a lymph system in constant overdrive, with new swelling in the lymph nodes under my right arm and new pain in that breast, the one in which they thought I had inflammatory breast cancer [but it was all the lupus]. I suspect that other recent issues are a sign that it's attacking organs now, because it almost invariably begins with the kidneys, but I've had thyroid and esophageal and lung issues already. This is not just "feeling a little bad"; this is full-blown disease that understandably sends a lot of people to bed, never to get out of it. Oh, and there's the little problem of knowing that today's trip to the post office and standing in line will mean crippling pain tomorrow, the kind that means moving as little as possible because my knees and feet can no longer withstand the pain.
It also means everything takes me so much longer. I mean, everybody already knows that this year has been terrible on virtually every front, so much so that we're really up against it now. This year has been so slow that we're way behind on everything, including prepaying next year's taxes [that's a zero; a big fat zero]. I'm so much farther behind on everything, even more than I usually am: pushing sales, paperwork, housework, you name it. I did at least get his two newest works up here the other night, so there's that. They're both amazing, but the turtle is something truly extraordinary. If I could sell that this week, I could quit worrying at least until November.
Still. We have to make up a LOT of ground financially over the next three+ months. A LOT. I need to bring in at least one sale a week, preferably two, for the remainder of the year. And it's clear that my illness's progression means that I cannot maintain the pace or workload I have in years past. That means that we need help with shares, and with testimonials, too. If you have some of Wings's work and are willing to have a testimonial published on the site, send it to me via the Contact form (we will list you however you wish, by name, name and initial, initials only, some other way that doesn't identify you; you can see an example in our newest, here, and with luck, I'll have a second one up by tonight). All the links are listed below, so please share:
- Sales here;
- Testimonials here;
- Amazon wishlist here (apparently the sponges are unavailable, but the other two things I need that I can't get here are the Bar Keeper's Friend coffeemaker cleaner and descaler; we're entirely out of both [or Amazon cards, and I can order them myself]);
- Patreon here;
- Ko-fi here.
There's lots of fabulous work on the site, and there will be much, much more in the weeks to come. The way this year has gone, things will still be grim for a good while and the holidays will be here before you know it, so please share all of the links.
All content, including photos and text, are copyright Wings and Aji, 2023; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.
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