Already gone.

Photo copyright Aji, 2022; all rights reserved.

Some of that snow is already gone. Even so, what was still gold yesterday has gone brown today, and what leaves remain on the branches are being stripped away fast by the wind. It's cold, made more so by that wind, and perfectly clear.

And it drove me into an asthma attack, which is how I woke up this morning: coughing, unable to breathe, dealing wtih all this crap all over again. I am tired, my head hurts from the attack, and my body hurts more, too, so I'm not even bothering with the rest; I have too much offline work to get done, so the rest is all cut-and-paste. It's all still relevant, and if I don't make some sales soon, we're screwed.

But there's still the problem of sales, or more to the point, the lack of any this past week. Without sales, or more income from somewhere, we don't make it. Not this month, not next month, not the rest of the year. This has been a sepctacularly bad year for sales (and my Patreon, too, which is down several hundred dollars a month [one patron kindly gave me a few month's heads-up, but the rest is just cancellations and attrition courtesy of a terrible economy]), and between last year's installment payments and next year's quarterly payments, the tax burden is killing us. 

As I said yesterday, my health is killing me, too, and the financial stresses are only compounding that.

The long and short of it on that front is that there is, at the moment, nothing to be done for me. I can't take the meds that keep certain symptoms under control, because the meds create other symptoms that frankly have the potential to kill me, too. I've been off them for a couple of months now, and I'm still enduring the nasty side effects (it takes several months to get them out of your system) plus all the returning problems of having absolutely no protection for my connective tissue. You may think that means joint pain, and it does, excruciatingly so, but what you probably don't know is that it also means organ function. I can already feel an increase in esophageal and tracheal issues. The tumor in my thyroid seems to be aggravating neck function, and Spirit alone knows what the tumors on my liver are doing. No, there isn't anything, in practical terms, that I can do for all of this except deal, and it's getting harder and harder to do that.

The financial stresses of this year have damaged my mental health, which is already reeling from the physical issues. And all of it combines to make the stress levels worse, and around and around we go in a vicious circle with no end to it.

I am at the end of my tether, though. I need help. I need to bring in enough sales to cover the rest of the tax burden (into four figures), and another four figures' worth to enable Wings to get the silver he needs to fulfill commissions and create holiday inventory. It all crashes to a halt without those two things covered, and right now, there's not a hope in hell of covering either one. A couple of really good sales for the holidays would do it, but I'm not convinced the economy is good enough for that.

All the links are here; please, share them, too (and there's a new wishlist priority, the automatic composter, which will do wonders for saving on waste and allow Wings to compost the land and trees regularly even through the winter; my physical function is impaired enough now that things can only get done if I have the help of equipment like this):

• Sales here; 
• Testimonials here; 
• Amazon wishlist here (priorities are, first and foremost, the automatic composter and the wheelbarrow, then the other ladder);
• Patreon here;
• Ko-fi here.

We're still hoping to put aside enough for a new well when the ground thaws enough to drill in the spring, too, Nah, we've given up on the well. No one's available to drill before late next year at the earliest, and this year's tax burden means we would never be able to afford it anyway. But it's even more of a good time to make a purchase, because Uncle Sam is a vindictive colonizer, and my current stress levels about paying it all are off the charts. And there's lots of fabulous work, so please share all of the links. 

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Wings and Aji, 2022; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.