Small but measurable improvements. Big measurable costs. Sales, subscribers, and shares all badly needed.

Photo copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved.

It's far too early to start talking in terms of success, much less of survival. But Shade is measurably improved today, by several markers. We have to force ourselves to be hard-headedly realistic, and we know that that does not mean she'll beat this thing, but it does give us a few more glimmers of hope. Overnight, she began passing small amounts of wet manure, a little here and a little there, which is absolutely the safest way for this to happen and what we want to keep happening. She's spending more time on her feet than down today; this morning, when she lay back down for a while, she shifted sides, whihc tells me that she thinks that will move things through somewhat. She's feeling herself enough, too, to fight Wings on the Banamine, although she should know by now she's not gonna win that one. And she's both eating and drinking water in small but steady amounts. This is progress, and while it seems like nothing much, horse people will know that it's actually huge. We have some hope.

That's her just a few moments ago. The two lines on her right side are where she was shaved the other night for the ultrasound. The thing on her face is a fly mask; this drought is so bad that we actually have fewer flies than usual, but given how she feels overall, they're bothering her a lot more than usual, too. Those spots on her hind legs are a product of all the up-and-down as she tries to get comfortable, and the loss of weight on her topline, transferred to her belly? That's the Cushing's, and the liver issues.  Probably all related, and all probably greatly affected by climate change.

So is their feed. Our vet has told us that she's seeing record cases of colic the last few years, but also more Cushing's more laminitis, more outright founder, and what seems like a fantastically HUGE jump in cancer cases and other tumors/masses. Part of it is undoubtedly an uptick in diagnostic work, but she says it's way beyond that. And our drought has been going on for years, worsening steadily and measurably the last three, with massive climate-change effects visible since 2011 in real time. What these changes are doing to the hay they eat, and the grain they get, is actually frightening to contemplate.

We're down to the very last few bales from last year's hay. We'd need to get more anyway, but now it's emergent. The only thing she can have from here on in is high-quality grass hay, which, in this drought? To say it's at a premium is already the understatement of the year. The guy we used to buy our supplemental hay from in the winter has sold his business to the guy who buried Cree and Ice for us, and he's going to sell us 30 bales at the end of the week. At almost sixteen bucks a bale, that's wipe-out territory; almost 500 bucks in one shot. But there isn't a choice. In this drought? If we get only a few, by the time we need more, there won't be any.

On top of all that, of course, are the vet bills. This is going to be hugely expensive, and while our vet is both a friend and willing to work with us, she has to get paid, too. I have no idea where this will leave us when it's all done, whatever the outcome, but I do know that it will not be good. We need sales badly. I need Patreon subscribers badly, and since this is July 1st, if you subscribe today, you won't be billed until August 1st. Here are the links and a request to share them, because without those sales and subscribers, I honestly don't know how we get through this:

• My new Patreon, The Interstices (Writing Between Worlds);
• Wings's site, for sales, with new items posted;
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to all of our medical bills, which continue to mount);
• Amazon wishlist, which mostly consists of animal and household stuff;
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. There are new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need to replace (either because the RV ruined it or because we gave it away when we had to downsize).

I had said that I'd really like to raise another $500 in subscriptions before July is out, just to have a little more to throw to the medical wolves that are constantly at my throat. Now, we've got a lot more that needs to be done, too, and I'm damned if I know how. The truck was more than enough to throw a wrench in the works, but this thing with Shade? And once you're in it, you have to keep going; there's no way out but forward, whatever the result. So please, please share the links. Thanks to my new patron, to the one who upped her pledge, and to those folks who have kicked in on Shade's behalf already; we're profoundly grateful, and we love you all. Shade does, too, even if she can't verbvalize it.

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2018; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.