Blocking progress.

Photo copyright Aji, 2019; all rights reserved.

That's one of the glaciers that calved off the roof of the hay barn on Saturday. it's all in a big heap at the bottom now, blocking progress.

Story of my life: blocking progress.

I said yesterday that, by the 28th, we would have paid out more than $5K? Little did I know.

I don't have my biospy results yet, but at 7:30 this morning, St. Vincent sent me a bill (do-not-reply, of course, and not so much as a phone number in the e-mail; pay up now, cash on the barrelhead) for just shy of sixteen hundred bucks. This was the bill my doctor estimated would be $200. Because I never take people's estimates as gospel, I had nearly tripled that in my brain to somewhere between five and six hundred. But SIXTEEN HUNDRED?  AND I DON'T HAVE THE RESULTS YET?  OH, HELL, NO.

We paid out four figures to the tax man on Friday. We have three medical appointments between us this week and my inhaler has to be refilled today.  All of that was gonna set us back close to a thousand by itself. And then there's whatever has to be done post-biopsy, and either way, it's going to be ugly. I give up give in, surrender, uncle, whatever. I can't keep this up.

And the worry over money just gets worse seemingly by the day. The Pueblo's been closed since the first of the month, and will remain so through most of March. Sales are vanishingly slim, and there's a lot of year ahead of us. If it is cancer, the costs are going to skyrocket very fast, and we have no way of paying for it, and neither of us cares; we're doing this. Determination is the word; with Wings's help, I'm going to beat whatever it is. So much fear intertwined with all of this, and no end in sight. We need sales. Badly. Selling today's featured work, shown just below, would take care of the biopsy costs. Even so, all this stuff is piling up fast and I have to get us through the whole year, not just the next two weeks, so please share the links (or use them, if anyone's so inclined):

• My Patreon, The Interstices (Writing Between Worlds) (and if you subscribe today you won't be billed until March 1st for February);
• Wings's site, for sales, with lots of new items posted;
• Wings's direct PayPal link;
• A way to buy me coffee (which actually goes to all of our medical bills, which continue to mount);
• Amazon wishlist, which mostly consists of animal and household stuff, with the kibble back on it; we gave several of our existing bags to a local disabled vet with a starving rescue dog who needed the help;
• Partial registry #1, from Bed, Bath and Beyond. I've added two or three new kitchen-y things on it now, stuff that I didn't realize we'd need.

All we want, to be able to have some confidence in making it through the whole year with whatever they're going to find going wrong in my body, is to make some sales. That's it: sales; nothing else. But I haven't been able to make even that happen, and the stress is telling. Good vibes for Raven are still welcome (he's still hanging with us, and I need him to be safe while we're out). But I could use some, too. We all could also use some help with sharing Wings's site (and testimonials, if you got 'em). Thanks.

All content, including photos and text, are copyright Aji, 2019; all rights reserved. Nothing herein may used or reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the owner.